Passenger on Board - short story over one week (or so)

This monologue first appeared in Issue 17 of Open Wide Magazine 

Only started in the minicabs because it suits me. Pick your own hours, be your own boss. Also means there’s time to rehearse the band but even that’s gone off the boil lately. We lost our drummer about three months back and drummers are really hard to come by. Philpot reckons we should get a computer or a machine or something but I dunno’. I’m just in it for a laugh anyway and the truth is I haven’t got a clue how they work or anything. Anyway, you can’t have three guitars and a machine - it’d look all wrong. Try naming one band with a drum machine and three guitars … although Philpot keeps going on about this band called … can’t remember now. Anyway, I told him I’d never heard of them whoever they were. So, because it’s been kind of slow and we’re all broke we’ve sort of let it slide I suppose … mainly ‘cos of the cost the rehearsal space now we can only split the room hire three ways.Since Gill left and we stopped rehearsing it’s been a nightmare. Too much time on my hands. Not that Gill went very far - only back to her place downstairs. Should never have started seeing her, not living on top of her and stuff. Used to say she could run but she couldn’t hide. Wouldn’t have minded being dumped except within a week she was with some other muppet and I had to listen to them going at it. I mean she could’ve played away from home.

Started the longer hours just to stay out of the way and keep busy plus I reckon I’ve got some catching up to do. What I mean is that at my age I should have some money in the bank and a decent place to live. Anyway I haven’t so maybe all these break-ups are like a blessing … some sort of blessing … a chance for me to think about what I’m going to do and maybe earn some extra cash. All these hours at the wheel gives your brain time to wander forwards, sideways but mainly backwards. Your past is in front of you. Recently the two main things on my mind (as the lights flash past) have been women (under the categories: What Could Have Been, Missed Chances and Bad Behaviour) and stuff I thought was long forgotten. This stuff makes me angry … really angry. Not that I’m an angry person or anything. You ask anyone … they’ll tell you I’m pretty laid back. Thing is my mind keeps settling on the same old things and it’s like this feeling injustice and that’s one thing I hate. Doesn’t have to be an injustice done to me or anything - could be anyone - even someone I don’t know.

tbc …